Loving a verbally and emotionally abusive man was the most confusing and contorted place I have ever been. It feels very much like falling down Alice’s rabbit hole: words don’t mean what they are supposed to mean; what I tried to do ‘right’ or to make things better inevitably worked against me; I was told …
Abuse is an enormous problem, affecting millions, made difficult to see. Not only is it usually hidden and shrouded in denial, but it’s obscured by the fact that it’s hard to understand. Why would adults revert to hitting or belittling the person with whom they are supposed to be close? In addition, myths about the …
In an abuser’s mind, he isn’t being “abusive” or “controlling”, he’s expressing anger. It’s common for the abuser to feel “attacked” by his victim, although a clearer perspective shows she has not attacked him or abused him, she has only expressed an opinion or practiced some act of self determination. The abuser often tries to …
